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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 8, 2020 9:16:35 GMT
Thought I had posted the wrong link then. When did Italy move to the Middle east? Sort your shit out BBC |
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Post by Campervan Von Bigglesworth on Mar 9, 2020 16:08:40 GMT
In line with the French government advice, the UK government has banned all gatherings of more than 1000 people. Port Vale matches will therefore remain unaffected.
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Post by Campervan Von Bigglesworth on Mar 10, 2020 13:38:26 GMT
Talky bit in the office. I was surmising the atmosphere about the place was like we were waiting for a big asteroid to crash into the earth. Darragh surmised it nicely by saying, "If this was a disaster film, we're still in the first 20 minutes".
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Post by danceswithclams on Mar 10, 2020 22:40:36 GMT
I've developed flu-like symptoms this evening but I haven't been to Italy or near any chinks.
I have been to both Birmingham and Liverpool in the past two days though.
Should I burn all my possessions/house/partner?
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 11, 2020 0:43:08 GMT
I've developed flu-like symptoms this evening but I haven't been to Italy or near any chinks. I have been to both Birmingham and Liverpool in the past two days though. Should I burn all my possessions/house/partner? So that's why people have been stockpiling bog paper and hand sanitizer. Home made firelighters made from shitwipe and sanitizer would be a good way of starting a fire to burn their infected possessions/house/partner. Vitamin C, paracetamol and a left handed wank might be a less drastic way to help your immune system fight your filthy viruses. If that doesn't work then nothing will..... R.I.P. |
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 11, 2020 0:51:27 GMT
The fucking Health Secretary has got Covid 19 coronavirus now. Not very bloody healthy is it.
Hope she passes it on to Boris Johnson.
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Post by Campervan Von Bigglesworth on Mar 12, 2020 17:24:56 GMT
Well, looks like I’ll be wanking from home for the foreseeable
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 12, 2020 19:32:42 GMT
Well, looks like I’ll be wanking from home for the foreseeable Don't forget to wash your hands for 20 seconds afterwards. |
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Post by Campervan Von Bigglesworth on Mar 18, 2020 16:46:38 GMT
Morning all, please ensure you are stocking up on tinned food and shotguns ready for the forthcoming Stephen Kings "The Stand" style pandemic. I've run some numbers based on what I know at the moment, and I estimate that the global death toll could be around 200 million, based on the current infectivity rate and a mortality of 3%. I would lay off the Chinese food and if you have any Chinky neighbours, I would chase them away with firey sticks. looking pretty prescient now, I would say! Go me! Oh, and I did stock up on tinned food and shotguns. |
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 20, 2020 21:13:23 GMT
Whilst some folk get to work from home - I get to attend work six bloody days a week. Thankyou panic buyers!
I'll be working at 6am in the morning loading trailers for Sainsbury's whilst trying to remain six foot from my fellow colleagues and as far away from the management as possible.
On a positive note; in the eyes of the government, I am no longer a low skilled scumbag peasant but instead I am an official keyworker responsible for feeding the entire nation*
*well about 15% of it anyway.
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 20, 2020 21:29:36 GMT
In other news: pubs, cafes and restaurants will all be forced to close now throughout the UK. Tim Martin of Wetherspoons fame will be unhappy as the selfish whiny wanker with ridiculous hair was actively encouraging people to ignore Government advice so he could keep making millions.
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Post by Campervan Von Bigglesworth on Mar 21, 2020 21:33:52 GMT
Whilst some folk get to work from home - I get to attend work six bloody days a week. Thankyou panic buyers! I'll be working at 6am in the morning loading trailers for Sainsbury's whilst trying to remain six foot from my fellow colleagues and as far away from the management as possible. On a positive note; in the eyes of the government, I am no longer a low skilled scumbag peasant but instead I am an official keyworker responsible for feeding the entire nation* *well about 15% of it anyway. Good for you and your colleagues, imagine how it would be if there was no food as well, it would be anarchy |
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Post by arkansasstokefan on Mar 22, 2020 2:57:42 GMT
I’m bored shitless. Been at home for days. The National guard is out in some of the larger cities. Building a few houses so went out to look at the land today  |
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 22, 2020 18:16:01 GMT
Looks like a fantastic view.
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Post by Campervan Von Bigglesworth on Mar 22, 2020 21:51:34 GMT
Aaaasegh , a fucking bear!!!!!!!
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Post by arkansasstokefan on Mar 25, 2020 11:34:03 GMT
How are you guys doing?
We are asked to shelter in place but no real way to enforce it out here in rural America.
Working from the house but honestly not that much work to do. Shifted to online training to pass some of the time and reaching home schooling as we ain’t going back to school until next fall.
Lots of people will not follow any rules. Those people will probably live but the grandparents of those people are at risk....
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 25, 2020 22:53:00 GMT
We're not quite on full lockdown yet. People have been told to stay at home, non essential businesses have been forced to close. Schools etc. are shut. People are still expected to work if they are in health care, pharmacy and farming, food manufacture, food distribution and shops selling essentials. The government seem to think its a good idea to allow exercise outdoors by allowing people to leave their home once a day to go for a walk, run or cycling. Also people can still shop for food, household goods and medical supplies etc.
I still have to go to work (where we are trying our best to stay 2 metres apart). The only time I'm outside is for the 20 minute walk to and from work but there are people out and about in the streets for no apparent reason but most people appear to be sticking to the new rules.
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 27, 2020 11:25:23 GMT
The fucking Health Secretary has got Covid 19 coronavirus now. Not very bloody healthy is it. Hope she passes it on to Boris Johnson. Should I feel guilty for typing this? ^^^ Breaking news: Boris Johnson has tested positive for coronavirus. |
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Post by Campervan Von Bigglesworth on Mar 28, 2020 12:55:32 GMT
I just hope he has access to a ventilator!! #prayforboris
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Post by Time4aPINT on Mar 31, 2020 13:37:39 GMT
Not quite the start of the zombie apocalypse but Llandudno town centre in Welsh Wales has been taken over by wild goats. With all the locals staying inside the goats feel safe that no peculiar Welsh people are going to try and shag them.
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